Thursday, April 8, 2010

Indecent exposure

Remember that line in Kindergarten Cop when that cute 5 year old announces that boys have a penis and girls have a vagina? Growing up I was not around male parts. I have four sisters. Now I have two boys. Two boys that fancy their male parts. Cohen is constantly fiddling. Whether is subconscious or not it bothers me. Ethan isn't as taken with his, thank goodness.

Well, the other day Cohen and I were eating lunch at a food court that's right next to a huge movie theater. I'm about half way through my meal and Cohen is bored. He's taken two bites of his food and is on to the next thing. He seriously has ADD when it comes to meal time (like this morning when he was supposed to be eating his pancakes but instead he was outside on his bike in the backyard - I said to him, Cohen come sit down and eat your breakfast and he says to me, mom, I am sitting down. AHHHHH), but I digress. So here I am mid-bite and he announces to me and the four other FULL tables around us that he needs to go potty. So I turn around and he has dropped his pants around his ankles and is taking aim on the closest plant he can find in the nearby planter. DIE. RED FACE. PANIC. My kid is about to urinate in a public food court planter with 15 other people watching. Again, DIE. So, of course I scoop him up and take him to the closest bathroom I can find only to have to return to my table among the 15 people who are now quite familiar with Cohen's male parts. I have never eaten so fast in my life.

A few hours later I told Eric this story....

J: I mean where did he get this from, he has never done this before.
E: Um, well... it's probably my fault.
J: I'm listening.
E: The other day when I took the boys on a bike ride they both had to go the bathroom so I told them to just find the closest bush.
J: Wow.


Cortney said...

aaahahahahaha! seriously. so. funny.

anne said...

sorry i have to comment again....
sorry you had to claim him as your child

Diane said...

Well, I am now admitting that it is Star Valley's fault. When ever my boys, big or small were, are there, and they have the need to relieve. . . anywhere is fine. Sorry Josie. Perhaps it is not learned, it is heredity! At least your boys are like mini M. Angelo's! and that is heredity!

Sarah said...

So is it bad that Nathan had to go to the bathroom really bad today so as soon as we got out of the El Pollo Loco drive thru I pulled up next to the nearest bush and he got out and went? We seriously do that all of the time- I consider it one of the perks of having boys! I must admit though, doing it in a planter in the middle of a food court is pretty bad- and pretty funny!